All grown up too quickly, i'm not ready

wishing back the days of pushchairs,shitty nappies, little teddy!

Now days just consist of Ps4 and 'out wit fellas'

college over, chasing women, as he's knocking back the stella's!

I thought sleepless nights were over, by god was i wrong

now you're older and out drinking they seem twice as flaming long! 

I sit waiting on the sofa, phone gripped tightly in my hand

recalling words my mum once said…"one day you'll understand!"

I'm watching this young adult now, booking holidays online
who tries to ease my worries saying "don't fret mum…i'll be fine"
you wrap them up in cotton wool, protect them all you can
then one day that little baby…grows up to be a man!


you wake up to find him naked,sprawled out upon the floor
piss wet through clothing in a heap beside the door,
no crisps and pepsi weekends, put that disney film away
the baby's gone,the boys all grown…the man has come to stay!

you taught him life as best you could
you know you taught him well
now let him grow and watch him live
and time will only tell.

1. We walked for miles in the cold today, just to sit here on the dampened sand and watch the sun set over the sea. Found washed up pebbles like tired faces and laughed at un-important things…

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Dementia

With eyes so lost you look at me
...another banished memory
you smile because you know my face
but yet my name, you can not place.

Where is the woman i know is so strong
where are the memories we'd laugh upon?
What happened to the lady so proud who stood tall,
Dementia has stolen…stolen it all.

A distant frail lady now sits in a chair
a vacant expression along with her there
Remembering childhood,with her father and mother
finding hard to recall, any memory of other.

22/03/16

House that jack built

I live in the house that jack built
And i tried to repair...
Its getting to the stage
Where i wish i didn't care.

The guttering is leaking
Waterfalls upon our head
The door decided not to lock
Then Alfie broke his bed.

The cupboards in the kitchen
All been chewed on my the dog
The past few weeks been hectic
And we cannot flush our bog!

The gate has fallen off out front
Others dodgy at the back
Taps gone dicky,pipes are leaky
Thanks to bloody jack.

He's done my bloody head in since i bought this chuffin place
I'd love to blinkin meet him
And smack him in the face

Instead i'll do my best
To patch the house of dis-repair
But it's getting to the stage...
Where i wish i wasn't there!

Love again

So love had been 

And love had gone

She didn't think

She'd carry on

Through darkest dreams

Of blackened sorrows

His smile brought hope

Of new tomorrows.

She found a way 

To love once more

A love she'd never 

Felt before

Excitement dances 

Like a flame

That loving feeling

Once again.

The mum and Me...

I'm the monster scare-awayer

When it's dark and time for bed,

Expert plaster putter-onner

For those cuts from toe to head.

A degree in cuddles,snuggles

Warming words for a broken heart,

And i'm quickest draw at hankies

For when the tears start.

I'm cook although my meals 

Do not always look so great

It's dished up quick and all a fed

A meal on their plate.

I'm referee to stop the wars

When fists may start to fly,

But when all is calm and all asleep

I sometimes sit and cry.

I'm ironer, cleaner,

dog shit picker-upper,slave,

And when all falls down around me

On the outside I am brave.

I'm billy whizz at shopping

With a trolley on two wheels,

Dashing home with twenty bags

To prepare thte evening meals.

The constant nag of naggerers

That's always on your case, 

The one who sees that cocky

Little look upon your face.

I'm painter, decorator

Odd job woman, mrs fix it,

If it has a tear just hand a thread

I'll see if i can stitch it.

I'm the voice that will defend you

If you're ever treated wrong

And the arms that wrap around you

When your days been hard and long.

I am not a robot,

Who i sometimes feel to be

If you look at little closer; you will find

...i'm only ME!

I'm the clown to make you smile

When you're feeling at a low,

But you step out of line

And believe me, you will know.

I'm the lego castle builder

I'm the ever ready purse,

And i'm always armed and ready

If you ever need a nurse.

I'm the solver of a problem

I'm the shoulder here to lean

I'm the fastest chocolate hider

You have ever bloomin seen.

I am the ears that listen

I am the heart that bleeds,

The one who tries her very best 

To cater all your needs.

I'm the fighter of the battles

I can conquer any army,

I'm the bestest ever maker 

of a tripple decker sarnie.

I can fix the un-fixable

Just pass a little glue,

I'm a super duper trooper

But that's all down to you.  

Just when I think I know it all

You teach a little more,

I stand back and often think

Why did i not know that before?

I'm the one who's been there

Got the T.shirt; don't you see?

But so often you're the ones

That i find are teaching me.

I'm the one who watches

As every day you grow

The one who often wonders

Where did the years go?

I'm the one who worries

If ever you're late home,

Pacing up and down the floor

Checking on the phone.

I'm the hand to guide you

Heart to love you, arms to hold,

The rock to keep you safe

From what life may unfold.

You're the laughter in my life

You're the love that keeps me strong,

You're the ones that make me realise

I'm right where I belong.

You're the ones that bring me sunshine

You're the ones that find my smile,

You're the ones that reassure me

That it's all been so worth while.

But somewhere, in between the cooker,

Plaster putter-onner; picker-upper

Look a little closer and you'll see

Somewhere deep inside...

There's only ME.

Dream

I shall not sleep,only to dream

I shall live to dream

Yet i shall dream as if i'll live forever

And live as if i'll die today